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Kel frowned. “And what if it splits apart completely, and we can’t ever put it back together again? And what if the Ael then stay in pain forever?”
“I don’t want that. But… we have to try something.”
“Finn. You’re asking me to risk the Ael being in pain forever, just so that humans can have magic. Humans are fine without it.”
“They can survive, yes, but… I mean, have you thought about what will happen to mages when magic is restored? What if it hurts us?”
Kel pursed her lips. “I don’t…”
“You don’t want it to, but it might, right?” He could feel that he was gaining traction. “We’ve had magic for hundreds and hundreds of years now. Are you sure we can go back?”
Kel sighed. “I don’t know. But we don’t have any evidence that fixing what Morthil did will hurt humans. And it will help the Ael. And we don’t have much time. Have you found a way to…?”
“Not yet, but I will.”
“How much time is left?” she asked softly.
“Enough.” He said it more sharply than he’d intended, saw her flinch, and immediately felt bad. “I’m sorry, Kel.”
“I know you’re trying to do what will be best for the mages.”
He shook his head, his scalp throbbing, his body aching with exhaustion. “Please, just think about it. Help me find a way forward.”
She nodded, sadly. “I’ll try, but, if we can’t…”
Finn gave a heavy answering nod. “I know.”
48
Kel
An hour later, Kel sat playing with Smoke in her room when a knock interrupted them. Smoke looked up, and even though she couldn’t read his thoughts anymore, she could see the curiosity in his face.
Maybe Finn had reconsidered already, Kel thought. But when she opened the door it was not Finn but Illiam.
“Hi, Kel,” he said, tilting his head and giving her a half-smile.
Kel wondered if he was starting to like being frozen solid. She just hoped he didn’t find out that she couldn’t anymore.
“Can I come in?”
“No.”
“Just for a minute?”
She didn’t say anything, and started closing the door.
He lifted both hands. “OK, OK, I won’t. But I think you will want to hear what I have to tell you.”
“Why’s that?”
He locked eyes with her, and her stomach constricted.
“I’m a shadow mage.”
“What?” He couldn’t be. That was impossible. And how did he know that was what she needed? She resumed shutting the door in his face. For a moment, Illiam flickered out of sight, then back, and Kel’s hand paused on the door.
“Whoa,” he said. “You’re a lot harder to pull that on than the rest of them.”
It was the same thing she’d seen Sarai do.
He was grinning now. “Still don’t want to talk to me?”
She took a step back into the room, opening the door wider.
Smoke glared and climbed up onto a high shelf, watching from above as Illiam entered, looking around.
“Nice place.”
“Illiam, you can’t possibly… how… how did you do this?”
“I told you, I’m great. I’m great at this.”
She waited, not speaking.
“You going to offer me something to drink?”
“No.”
“To sit?”
Without waiting for a response, he moved to one of the two armchairs by the fireplace. He sat, leaning back comfortably, one hand on each knee. She moved around to where she could face him but stayed standing.
“How are you not a fire mage anymore?”
“I told you I could help you,” he said, smiling.
“And how did you know I need a shadow mage?”
“I asked one of Isabelle’s assistants. I’ve seen you talking with her a lot.”
So he’d been watching her. Great.
“OK, but…”
“I figured it must be possible. I’m the most powerful mage here. Except for you, of course.” He tipped his head to her and gave an ironic flourish with his hand.
“It doesn’t matter how powerful you are, that’s not possible.”
“Well, as you can see… it is possible.”
Kel narrowed her eyes. Was this some trick? If so, how was he doing it?
“I don’t believe you,” Kel said. “Being a powerful mage shouldn’t somehow make you able to change types.”
His smile was fading slightly. Clearly, he had expected her to be more impressed.
“Come on, does it matter? Isn’t it enough to know that I can help you?”
“Not when there are so many people who want my brother dead. Not when the demon he made a bargain with ten years ago is close to being free. No. If you don’t give me a good reason for how you got this power then you can get up and leave now.”
“But…”
She waited.
“I just… figured it out.”
She waited longer.
“I… read an old book.”
“Which one?”
“Magic…types?”
She crossed her arms.
“Come on, I can’t change back now.” His voice got whinier.
“How do you know that?”
His neck was starting to get red, and he sat up a little straighter in his chair.
“I… I don’t… I just… feel all stretched out now.” He heaved a long deep breath and sighed it out. “Fine. I’m not a mage.”
Her eyebrows raised, and Kel glanced up, met Smoke’s look of interest.
“You look like a mage.”
“Well, I wasn’t born one. And I…I didn’t become one when I turned sixteen, all right? But… I was supposed to. I know I should have.
I… I asked Finn about it actually, because I don’t really understand it. And he was wondering why I was so powerful. Because, I’m much more powerful than—”
“OK, yes, I know, Illiam.” Kel couldn’t remember the last time she’d lost her temper. The last time she’d spoken to Illiam, probably.
“Anyway, Finn thinks that magic is still changing. The rift between the types is widening. There are mages in Montvale now. None as—well anyway it seems like things are becoming more malleable. His word. Anyway. I wanted to be a mage. I think I was supposed to be a mage, but something… went wrong. It didn’t happen for some reason.
“But I spent weeks thinking about it, thinking about fire and wanting to be a fire mage. I ran away from home and looked for mages who would teach me. I met one in the Uplands, but she laughed in my face and turned me away. I kept going. I nearly died up there, it was so cold. Snow everywhere. But that was what I needed, apparently. All that focus paid off and some dam broke inside me. And… since then I’ve been a fire mage.”
“So, you just decided to want to be a shadow mage?” Kel asked skeptically.
“More than that, Kel. But, yeah, and I think because I’d done it before it was maybe a little easier to… go out and back in…”
Kel remembered when she’d first done magic alone in the woods. Finn had come back, and he’d thought he’d traumatized her into becoming a mage early, when in fact it was only because she was an Ael. She wondered if maybe Illiam didn’t fully understand where he’d gotten his powers from. Maybe she and Morthil weren’t the only ones. Maybe a tiny part of him was Ael, too. Or… something.
She looked up to see Illiam watching her face intently, a hopeful expression on his face.
“You believe me?”
“I… I’m not sure.”
“Will you let me help you?”
“You know I want to fix magic, which will likely mean humans won’t be able to use it?”
He grinned. “I’m sure I’ll find a way around that.”
49
Sarai
As quickly as it had come, Sarai’s notoriety all but disappeared in the tsunami of rumors about Illiam changing to a shadow mage. As
much as she’d complained about the people who kept accosting her as she walked down the halls, asking her to show off her skills or retell how she’d fought off Frewin, now she was invisible again, overhearing the other students talk about Illiam in hushed voices. Talking about him and Kel. They said he’d done it to help her, which most of them found incredibly romantic.
Other students? Sarai thought. Why am I calling them the other students? I’m not a student. I’m here to do a job. A job I’ve been shirking because I liked playing at being something I’m not.
Would you stop whining about things that don’t matter? The imaginary Jeremy complained. We have a job to do.
I think you mean I have a job to do.
But the Jeremy in her head was right. She had a job to do. She was done playing mage savior one minute, abandoned and ignored again the next.
She went back to the library. Something when she’d fought Frewin had triggered an idea in her. She’d noticed something, as Finn was dying. There was a shadow component to the oath stone. A large one. It worked off some kind of shadow, and if she could just figure out what, maybe she could break it.
Sarai slept a few hours that night and then was back at the library first thing in the morning. She’d been there a few hours when a group of mages passed her table, glancing surreptitiously around them as they went. She folded in on herself as they went by, and their eyes slid over her one by one. At least some parts of being a shadow mage were useful.
They ducked between two adjacent bookshelves right behind her and began talking in hushed tones. Sarai scooted her chair back unobtrusively until she was close enough to hear them through the shelves.
“I told you, she went to talk to Arl, asked him if he would help her with that project we thought she was doing.”
“So? We knew she was working on something with the Ael.”
“Yeah, but that’s the thing. It’s not about the Ael. She wants to destroy magic.”
“What? No. Not Kel.”
“Yes. I’m telling you. That’s what she said. She said she needed one of each of us, and she’s got some ritual she wants to do. Something one of the monsters told her about. That’s why she needs Illiam, too.”
“You know she’s one of them, don’t you?” a girl whispered, lowering her voice even further so that Sarai was barely able to hear her.
“I heard she hates mages, wants to destroy magic because she doesn’t want anyone as powerful as she is.”
“That’s crazy, Kel is so nice. She healed my arm when Isabelle pushed me out of that tree.”
“Yeah, she’s nice, sure, until you hurt her plants or her monster parents.”
“Maybe one of them is possessing her or something,” a boy mused. “She’s always been so nice to me. But… she has been weird lately. And did you see her hand?”
“Yeah. It’s dying.”
“Do you think that means she’s losing her powers? Maybe whatever’s affecting the Ael is affecting her, too. Maybe that’s why she wants to get rid of magic.”
“Who knows why those things do what they do,” an older boy spat bitterly. There was a pause, and then some muttered agreement.
Sarai had heard enough. She picked up the book she’d been reading and went back to her room where she could read in peace.
Lying on her bed, Sarai continued to read. The sky outside her window grew dark as she turned page after page.
For the thousandth time, she read the description of shadow. Stemming from the subconscious of a mage, it was the part of magic that connected all the other types, that acted back on the mage. Shadow could overwhelm mages, and they could suffer irreversible consequences.
Something Agnes had said to her the first day they’d met came back to her. About how long various works of magic lasted. Those made with shadow lasted the longest. Indefinitely, as far as anyone knew.
Irreversible consequences. Yes. That was exactly what Sarai needed.
As she stared up at the ceiling, a plan formed in her mind. Well, it was another thing to try, at least. She’d take him someplace far from here and take care of it.
Finally. Just a few more hours and she would be done with this place.
“Sarai!” Jeremy’s voice was so high and tight she almost didn’t recognize it. She grabbed reflexively for the mirror, pulling off its cover, and what she saw made her heart stop.
Jeremy’s left eye was swollen shut, purple bruising all around it, a trickle of blood had dried below his nose, a smear of it graced his perfect chin.
“Jeremy, what… are you OK?” she managed to gasp out.
He tried to swallow, but gave a low groan of pain, then glanced over his shoulder. This was not the excited glance of anticipation and shared secrets she was used to. No. This was a glance of pure terror.
“Sarai, listen to me, I only have a second. They’ll… they’ll be back any minute now. The guy that hired us is furious. He… he thinks we’ve switched sides, or we’re playing him or something. He’s… I think he’s going to kill me.”
Sarai’s stomach dropped out from inside her. “Jeremy, I’m so… look, I’ve figured it out. Don’t worry, I just figured it out. Just now. I’ll go do it now. I’ll take care of it. Tell them I’ll take care of it.”
He nodded, forced a wry half smile onto his split lips, then groaned again.
“I’ve got to go. Please… hurry.”
“Hang on, Jeremy. That guy’s as good as dead. Less than an hour and I’ll have him. Tell them. And tell them… if they hurt you any more than they have already, I’ll kill them. Slowly.”
But Jeremy had closed the connection.
Sarai threw the book off her lap and jumped out of bed, her hands already going to her knives, strapping them on and throwing her clothes on over the top of that. She was halfway to the door when it was thrown open, and Agnes stormed in.
“Sarai! I’ve been looking everywhere for you.”
Sarai made a detour right around Agnes, not even stopping to look at her.
“I’m busy right now, can we talk later?”
“No, please, Sarai!”
Something hitched in Agnes’ voice and Sarai paused, just long enough to see the stricken look on her friend’s face.
“Something’s wrong with Kel. She’s gone… crazy or possessed or something.” Agnes waved her hands in desperation, tears in her eyes. “They say she’s… found a way to… destroy magic. They think it’s going to kill us.” She swallowed. “All of us.”
Sarai rolled her eyes. “She can’t just destroy magic.”
Agnes blanched. “You don’t know her like we do. She’s not human. She’s way more powerful than any of us and she… she knows things. Also, she’s been talking to the monsters. Ealish saw her. And now she’s going around saying she needs help to destroy magic, and…” Agnes looked helplessly at the ceiling. “And some people have been stupid enough to listen to her. They’re going to try it, Sarai. Right now. They’re going for the speaking pool. Apparently, that’s where they’ll do it.”
Sarai stopped, taking in fully what Agnes was saying. Kel had come to her with the same request. But it couldn’t be. She couldn’t actually be destroying magic. She couldn’t possibly know how to… but Sarai realized that she did believe. Yes. That strange, empty girl with no shadow, with no secret part of herself that only Sarai could see. That girl who’d tried to trick her, who already had all the types of magic, more than any of the others. She must have gotten her powers back.
How much of my skill will I lose if I’m no longer a shadow mage? She tried to shake the thought off. No. I can still do it. It’s me, not a bunch of stupid magic powers. I do what I do because I learned how.
Except you were always better; it came easily to you. Slipping into the shadows and seeing peoples’ secrets.
“Finn’s on his way to stop her. Please, come with me, you have to come help. We… we don’t know what that shadow mage is capable of. But maybe you can stop him.”
“Finn’s there?” Sa
rai asked.
“Yeah, up in the gardens. He’s blocking the way to the speaking pool. I don’t know… Kel may already have gotten past. There’s no telling what she’ll do.”
“Let’s go.”
Agnes’ expression dissolved into relief. She probably would have looked a lot less relieved if she’d known what Sarai was actually thinking.
Sarai sprinted after Agnes, up through the halls, her mind whirling. Kill Finn. Jeremy is in danger. They may be torturing him right as we speak. Sarai tried to pull her mind away from imagining what they were doing to him in those opulent rooms in Westwend. But if she killed Finn, Kel would destroy magic. She didn’t think it would really kill all the mages. That girl was odd… but she wasn’t a murderer. Sarai knew plenty of those, and she could tell what Kel would be willing to sacrifice and what she wouldn’t. And there was no way the girl was possessed. No. Kel was likely in her right mind, doing something she thought was right, for some stupid totally moral reason. But it still meant Sarai losing her powers. Herself.
She groaned, and Agnes shot her a terrified look.
“I’m fine,” she grunted, and they picked up speed, running at a breakneck pace, until they burst out into the gardens, Sarai still not having decided what she should do.
Shouts came from the far ends of the gardens. They pounded down the treelined path, rounding a corner to see an ornate door with a crowd in front of it.
Kel stood facing the door, ten students behind her. Finn and about seventy students stood in front of it, blocking her path.
“Kel, please, we just need a little more time. There has to be a way out of this,” Finn was saying.
“There isn’t, Finn, and we’re out of time. I have everything I need to do the ritual now. This fixes everything. Please.” There were tears in Kel’s eyes.
Sarai and Agnes skidded to a stop, joining the group clustered around Finn. Sarai caught sight of the stupid new shadow mage. His handsome eyes were locked on Kel, and he was everything but drooling as he watched her talk. Idiot. He was also sort of… glowing. The other mages all had various colors of magic inside them, and bits of shadow that Sarai could see, but this guy… Is that what I look like? He was filled with shifting colors, interlaced with darkness. Well, that’s pretty cool, she thought grudgingly.